Thursday, 5 July 2012

50 shades of .. ooh err, id rather not thanks


Damp, dreary, drizzly, dank, dismal – Are there any more pathetic sounding words beginning with D that can quite miserably some up the woeful month of June? Hang on, I think there is; Dingy, depressive, dispiriting, doleful, down cast, dull……..

My oppressive mood isn’t helped by the progressive increase in the weed coverage in my usually pest free veg patch. Knowing that the ground is far too saturated to perform a mass cull of the perennial invaders is in one hand quite relieving (especially to the cracks in my permanently soil covered fingers), and although I love to bestow to passing visitors how challenging and frustrating bending over and straining your back all day long can be, I secretly covert this small menial task.

It’s one of those things in life that people instinctively think you must hate performing, I receive similar comments on the time in which I get up – ‘You must be dreadfully tired ‘or ‘I don’t know how you get up at that time ‘are phrases that I most commonly hear, but being up and awake for 5.30am is simply a pleasure that is known only to those who choose to rise at such a time.

The sun boldly creeps up on you, framing the horizon with its sweet pea pink tinges and engaging glow, birds sing merrily at a multitude of tempos and octaves, with only themselves as an audience and all manner of wildlife contentedly go about their daily business with no immediate threats to hurry away from. On more than one occasion have I caught a mystical sight of a group of huddled woodland creatures, gathered together, holding some sort of council or village meeting. I peered from behind the feathered elderflower bush trying so desperately hard not to sneeze from the overbearing yeast extractions the elderflower can omit. I longed to witness some form of magical phenomenon but within a blink of an eye they all uniformly broke rank and carried on normally with their daily responsibilities.

Call it sleep deprivation if you wish, but whilst there are banks collapsing, financial markets crashing and wars never ending, its ultimately uplifting to have something that just for a tender moment can erase all of your problems and insecurities. Maybe I have been reading a little too much Enid Blyton and Jane Austin and its making me all whimsical and dreamy, but I’d rather that than read the latest offering from E.L.James   ( much to my husband’s disappointment ) .

To cheer up a husband who is quite literally coming to the end of his tether over the prolonged rainy forecast (due to his hay stocks being thwarted), I thought I would make him something that would quite magically bring a little sunshine back into his life and hopefully back into our impending climate.

Being consistently able to throw together an exceedingly good chocolate mousse without trying, I naturally thought a lemon mousse would be equally as simple to prepare but it turns out every recipe that I encountered used gelatine as a form of setting agent. It’s not that I have got any vegetarian like raging thoughts over the actual content of gelatine, I just couldn’t work out why it would be a necessity when it is so often not added when concocting the chocolate version. It’s not the first time I have proudly thought that I could self handily change the rules of basic cookery, like the time I tried to replace the whole amount of sugar in a cake with a similar amount of honey thinking it would be beneficial to my health – it’s too scientific to explain but it was only of benefit to make eagerly awaiting chickens!

Erasing this past disaster from my thoughts, I carried out the recipe to my own exactions, beating the egg whites to pillow forming mounts, creaming the most exuberant looking yolks with a small amount of sugar and the juice from the fruits then fastidiously folding together to make a fragrant but disastrously unformed mousse. To be honest by hopes were down and the mental bashing I was getting from my more cautious side had already begun. The upside was that I had made the mousse mixture that early in the morning no one was aware of its intended origins so I would be able to pass it off as lemony custard or a homemade version of Angel Delight.

Stored in its serving glasses in the fridge I tried to forget the mistaken mishap by baking some much called for shortbread (I call it restorative baking) to help soothe the angsts of my earlier fails.
Putting the shortbread dough I the fridge to rest (I wasn’t taking any shortcuts here) I carelessly threw it in knocking the first glass of unidentified lemon mixture over. I couldn’t bear to look. My afternoon of reading the Sunday papers and doing a recreational spot of weeding was now looking bleak as I envisaged that I would be cleaning up a un - recognisable form of lemon mousse from the grated racks in my refrigerator.

Through squinted eyes and bated breath I drew up the courage to look at the dessert disaster that would be right now dripping its way down onto blocks of cheese and cured meats that were strewn across my shelves, to find that there was no mess what so ever. The jar in which the mixture was encased was intact and so too was the mousse inside it!

Similar to the bewitching occurrence that had so plainly been shown to me by the woodland animals, this bit of kitchen alchemy was nothing short of a miracle that no one else would be witness too as it all happened before most are likely to stir in the real witching hours of the day.


Miraculous Lemon and Passion fruit mousse with chunky shortbread biscuits – serves 6
4 free range eggs – separated
2 tbls caster sugar
The zest and juice of two lemons
The juice of two passion fruits – sieved to remove the seeds
1 small tub of mascarpone

Whisk the egg yolks with the sugar and the juice and zest from the lemon and passion fruits. Whisk profusely until the mixture has almost doubled in volume.
In a separate bowl start off whisking the egg whites slowly then speed up once the mixture starts to thicken. Stop whisking when soft voluptuous mounds have formed.
Stir the mascarpone to soften it, and then combine it with the egg yolk mixture.
Add one tablespoon of the egg whites to the egg yolk mixture and mix quite vigorously until well combined. Discreetly add the rest of the whites, folding and cutting through the mixture with a large metal spoon. You must be careful at this stage not to destroy all of your hard whisking work, the lighter the mixture the better.
Pour into the desired serving vessels but bear in mind that the bigger the dish the longer it will probably take to set.
Place in the fridge for a good number of hours until you are ready to serve.


Chunky shortbread biscuits

4oz butter
2oz caster sugar
6oz plain flour
1oz ground rice

Mix the butter and the sugar until smooth.
Sift in the flour and the ground rice then rub in delicately until a ball can be formed from your dough.
Flatten out the dough with the palm of your hand or a rolling pin until you have reached your chosen thickness.
Cut into pretty shapes then place on a lined baking tray and pop in the fridge to rest for about an hour.
Preheat the oven to 140oc fan, remove from the fridge and bake on the oven for about 25mins turning the tray around half way through to ensure even baking.

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